Dear Victorious,
You seem like a pretty godly man. Do you still sin? And if you do, which sin(s) do you find the most troubling? Why?
Jacob R. - Pensacola, FL
Dear Jacob,
I'm not sure what the definition of a godly man would really be. Frankly, I probably used to have a good grasp of that. However, the closer I get to the Lord, the more preposterous the notion of human godliness becomes.
Yes, of course I still sin. I am a terrible sinner ... in desperate need of a Savior.
My most troubling sins are the ones I commit against the people I love most. Of course all of my sins are committed against God, whom I love even more than people. But when I commit a sin against someone whom I think highly of, my level of guilt and shame are considerably greater - as the enemy (Satan) tries to use those sins to condemn me.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Christening Pain
Dear Victorious,
My only daughter lives a couple of hourse from here, has a new baby and has invited me to her baby's christening at the church, as well as a lunch reception afterwards at her house. The problem is that she has invited her father (my ex-husband) and his wife as well. He was a bad husband who treated me poorly. Being with him would be painful for me. I feel like my daughter is asking the unreasonable. She says if I love my her and my granddaughter I'll "suck it up and deal with it." Who's right here? Is there a Biblical perspective?
Marlyse V. - Reno, NV
Dear Marlyse,
Your daughter is. If you don't go, your absence will be more noticeable than your presence. And it will cost you considerably more than the pain you'd have to bear with being there. Sometimes we have to take a little pain for the ones we love. Just as you had to share your daughter's milestones in life with her father, you'll have to continue to do so and continue to share your granddaughter's milestones in life with your ex-husband. There's no time like the present to come up with a game plan for how you're going to cope with a smile on your face when these situations arise.
Scripture commands us to lead with forgiveness, and to love our enemies. It further says that when we suffer pain as we do what God requires of us, we will be blessed. (Matthew 5) Your Father in heaven requires that you forgive your ex-husband, love him and his wife, pray for them, and treat them with grace at all times. He further acknowledges that this may be painful for you --- and He assures you that He will bless the sacrifice you make in obeying Him.
My only daughter lives a couple of hourse from here, has a new baby and has invited me to her baby's christening at the church, as well as a lunch reception afterwards at her house. The problem is that she has invited her father (my ex-husband) and his wife as well. He was a bad husband who treated me poorly. Being with him would be painful for me. I feel like my daughter is asking the unreasonable. She says if I love my her and my granddaughter I'll "suck it up and deal with it." Who's right here? Is there a Biblical perspective?
Marlyse V. - Reno, NV
Dear Marlyse,
Your daughter is. If you don't go, your absence will be more noticeable than your presence. And it will cost you considerably more than the pain you'd have to bear with being there. Sometimes we have to take a little pain for the ones we love. Just as you had to share your daughter's milestones in life with her father, you'll have to continue to do so and continue to share your granddaughter's milestones in life with your ex-husband. There's no time like the present to come up with a game plan for how you're going to cope with a smile on your face when these situations arise.
Scripture commands us to lead with forgiveness, and to love our enemies. It further says that when we suffer pain as we do what God requires of us, we will be blessed. (Matthew 5) Your Father in heaven requires that you forgive your ex-husband, love him and his wife, pray for them, and treat them with grace at all times. He further acknowledges that this may be painful for you --- and He assures you that He will bless the sacrifice you make in obeying Him.
Friday, February 26, 2010
Reconciliation
Dear Victorious,
Do you really believe in reconciliation? I mean, do you really think that two people who are estranged for years can truly reconcile?
Susan Q. - Richardson, TX
Dear Susan,
Yes, I do. And it is perhaps the most important issue facing Christianity ... because it is the only ministry that any of us have been given. (2 Corinthians 5:18-19).
Let's look at what reconciliation is. This Scripture that I just referenced explains how God reconciles us to Himself ... by "not counting men's sins against them." So if we are to be reconciled to each other, I believe that is how it must be done. Whatever offense, whatever differences that may have caused the estrangement between two people --- must not be counted against them.
Reconciliation is only possible if both parties equally commit to not holding the sins of each other against them. So, for example, you may be perfectly willing to do that, but if the other party isn't equally willing, reconciliation may continue to be look impossible. But even when this happens, reconciliation can still be hoped for - as we pray for the Lord to soften the heart of the other person and ourselves remain committed to loving them.
Do you really believe in reconciliation? I mean, do you really think that two people who are estranged for years can truly reconcile?
Susan Q. - Richardson, TX
Dear Susan,
Yes, I do. And it is perhaps the most important issue facing Christianity ... because it is the only ministry that any of us have been given. (2 Corinthians 5:18-19).
Let's look at what reconciliation is. This Scripture that I just referenced explains how God reconciles us to Himself ... by "not counting men's sins against them." So if we are to be reconciled to each other, I believe that is how it must be done. Whatever offense, whatever differences that may have caused the estrangement between two people --- must not be counted against them.
Reconciliation is only possible if both parties equally commit to not holding the sins of each other against them. So, for example, you may be perfectly willing to do that, but if the other party isn't equally willing, reconciliation may continue to be look impossible. But even when this happens, reconciliation can still be hoped for - as we pray for the Lord to soften the heart of the other person and ourselves remain committed to loving them.
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Slavery
Dear Victorious,
You blogged recently about human slavery and cited the high level of sexual and domestic slavery in the world today. Aren't you exaggerating this issue just a bit? I mean, aren't most of the people in the sex trade industry in it because they made that choice?
Jahn L. - Red Oak, TX
Dear Jahn,
No, I don't believe I'm exaggerating the issue at all. If it were being exaggerated, it would be done by our State Department, the media that report on it, the organizations that fight it, etc. Google human trafficking, or do a news search on the topic and you'll find plenty of recent reports. It isn't even just the U.S. government hyping this. It is a real problem.
You have to remember a couple of things here.
First, you don't have to drag someone off in chains in order to enslave them. It can often be done through intimidation, brain washing, preying on their desperation, threatening them in order to secure their cooperation, etc.
Second, more than half of those enslaved today are women and children. And some of them were dragged off in chains! Many with brute force.
As for your last remark, even if someone in the sex trade industry made that choice, many are enslaved today - based on studies that have been done through organizations that work to rehabilitate women coming out of the sex trade industry. Said differently, even if someone made a conscious choice to get into the sex trade industry, or the domestic services industry ... the fact that they now cannot make a conscious choice to get out of it is the best proof of their enslavement.
You blogged recently about human slavery and cited the high level of sexual and domestic slavery in the world today. Aren't you exaggerating this issue just a bit? I mean, aren't most of the people in the sex trade industry in it because they made that choice?
Jahn L. - Red Oak, TX
Dear Jahn,
No, I don't believe I'm exaggerating the issue at all. If it were being exaggerated, it would be done by our State Department, the media that report on it, the organizations that fight it, etc. Google human trafficking, or do a news search on the topic and you'll find plenty of recent reports. It isn't even just the U.S. government hyping this. It is a real problem.
You have to remember a couple of things here.
First, you don't have to drag someone off in chains in order to enslave them. It can often be done through intimidation, brain washing, preying on their desperation, threatening them in order to secure their cooperation, etc.
Second, more than half of those enslaved today are women and children. And some of them were dragged off in chains! Many with brute force.
As for your last remark, even if someone in the sex trade industry made that choice, many are enslaved today - based on studies that have been done through organizations that work to rehabilitate women coming out of the sex trade industry. Said differently, even if someone made a conscious choice to get into the sex trade industry, or the domestic services industry ... the fact that they now cannot make a conscious choice to get out of it is the best proof of their enslavement.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Plane Crash
Dear Victor,
How should we think about this guy who crashed his plane into the office building (in Austin, TX) recently because of a dispute he had with the IRS? Or how about the guy who was in the news for demolishing his own house to keep the bank from getting it in foreclosure? Can there be a Biblical perspective on these types of situations?
Ian T. - Miami Lakes, FL
Dear Ian,
There is always a Biblical perspective on any situation. Remember the Bible is God's Word, intended to be our "user manual" for life. So whatever we encounter in this world, you can be sure the Bible will tell us how to respond to it. And there are no exceptions to that either.
The guy who crashed his plane into an office building because he was made at the IRS also destroyed his house just prior to that. Then there is, as you mention, the guy who rented a bull dozer to take down his own home that was in foreclosure. What we have in both cases (and in mot similar cases) is sin. It's that simple.
The sin includes violation of the two most important commandments in the Bible. The first is to honor God ... and we do that by obeying Him. He told us, amongst other things, that we are to submit to the laws of our government (Romans 13:1-7) The second is to love others as you would want to be loved. Add to these the fact that Jesus told us to be peace makers, lead with forgiveness, abstain from violence (i.e., turn the other cheek), be reconciled, be kind to strangers, etc. You have a whole list of sins committed in these acts of human stupidity and atrocity.
Christ-followers pay their taxes. They follow the rules. The obey the government. And if they're accused of doing wrong, they work through the system to prove themselves innocent. If they are guilty, they take their lumps and make amends for their wrongs. These men are not behaving like Christ and should not be regarded as anything but worldly fools who are injuring innocent people with their sin.
How should we think about this guy who crashed his plane into the office building (in Austin, TX) recently because of a dispute he had with the IRS? Or how about the guy who was in the news for demolishing his own house to keep the bank from getting it in foreclosure? Can there be a Biblical perspective on these types of situations?
Ian T. - Miami Lakes, FL
Dear Ian,
There is always a Biblical perspective on any situation. Remember the Bible is God's Word, intended to be our "user manual" for life. So whatever we encounter in this world, you can be sure the Bible will tell us how to respond to it. And there are no exceptions to that either.
The guy who crashed his plane into an office building because he was made at the IRS also destroyed his house just prior to that. Then there is, as you mention, the guy who rented a bull dozer to take down his own home that was in foreclosure. What we have in both cases (and in mot similar cases) is sin. It's that simple.
The sin includes violation of the two most important commandments in the Bible. The first is to honor God ... and we do that by obeying Him. He told us, amongst other things, that we are to submit to the laws of our government (Romans 13:1-7) The second is to love others as you would want to be loved. Add to these the fact that Jesus told us to be peace makers, lead with forgiveness, abstain from violence (i.e., turn the other cheek), be reconciled, be kind to strangers, etc. You have a whole list of sins committed in these acts of human stupidity and atrocity.
Christ-followers pay their taxes. They follow the rules. The obey the government. And if they're accused of doing wrong, they work through the system to prove themselves innocent. If they are guilty, they take their lumps and make amends for their wrongs. These men are not behaving like Christ and should not be regarded as anything but worldly fools who are injuring innocent people with their sin.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
God Loves Us
Dear Victorious,
Do you really think that God loves us? I mean, I know what the Bible says. But besides what it says or what He does, what tangible evidence do we have that God really loves us?
Nathan R. - Germantown, MD
Dear Nathan,
Yes, of course I believe that God loves us. I also think about that too - quite a bit actually. But I see your point. It is incredible that God does love us. It is so incredible as to be unbelievable. But then that is the whole human experience with God ... to believe the unbelievable. God Himself is rather unbelievable from a human perspective - simply because He lives so far outside of what the human mind can comprehend.
What tangible evidence do we have that God really loves us? I think the most convincing evidence is that He chooses, and has chosen for centuries, to communicate with us. He has sent prophets, burning bushes, stone tablets, and a whole host of other communications to us. He sends His Holy Spirit even now, and continues to raise up new prophets through whom He speaks. But look at these in their totality, and ask yourself why He would do that. If God didn't care about us, what would be the point?
Frankly, that He wants to talk to us is the most compelling evidence I find that God loves us.
Do you really think that God loves us? I mean, I know what the Bible says. But besides what it says or what He does, what tangible evidence do we have that God really loves us?
Nathan R. - Germantown, MD
Dear Nathan,
Yes, of course I believe that God loves us. I also think about that too - quite a bit actually. But I see your point. It is incredible that God does love us. It is so incredible as to be unbelievable. But then that is the whole human experience with God ... to believe the unbelievable. God Himself is rather unbelievable from a human perspective - simply because He lives so far outside of what the human mind can comprehend.
What tangible evidence do we have that God really loves us? I think the most convincing evidence is that He chooses, and has chosen for centuries, to communicate with us. He has sent prophets, burning bushes, stone tablets, and a whole host of other communications to us. He sends His Holy Spirit even now, and continues to raise up new prophets through whom He speaks. But look at these in their totality, and ask yourself why He would do that. If God didn't care about us, what would be the point?
Frankly, that He wants to talk to us is the most compelling evidence I find that God loves us.
Monday, February 22, 2010
Separate Checking
Dear Victorious,
My husband and I have had separate bank accounts (we both work) for about three years now. My mother-in-law found out about that a little over a year ago and can't seem to stop harping about it. According to her, this "is not appropriate for a Christian marriage." But he and I neither one see anything wrong with it. Who is right here?
Nanette R. - Louisville, KY
Dear Nanette,
Well, your mother-in-law has a point. But harping on it is absolutely inappropriate. She could have been excused for offering her opinion once or twice. After that, she's lost any credibility to be heard.
While you and your husband may see nothing wrong with having separate bank accounts and keeping your money separately, there also isn't anything right about it. You see, we shouldn't just make decisions based on whether there is anything wrong with something. Things don't have to be specifically wrong for you not to do them. Moreover, the fact that there isn't specifically something wrong with something doesn't make it right.
Marriage is a union of two people - where they become one in every aspect possible. To hold out an important area of yourselves or your lives like money is inconsistent with the oneness that God prescribes for marriage. If you're willing to compartmentalize your finances, what else might you compartmentalize? Maybe separate finances aren't causing a problem in your marriage today. But they do suggest a weakness in your unity. Do you really want to go on with that weakness?
My husband and I have had separate bank accounts (we both work) for about three years now. My mother-in-law found out about that a little over a year ago and can't seem to stop harping about it. According to her, this "is not appropriate for a Christian marriage." But he and I neither one see anything wrong with it. Who is right here?
Nanette R. - Louisville, KY
Dear Nanette,
Well, your mother-in-law has a point. But harping on it is absolutely inappropriate. She could have been excused for offering her opinion once or twice. After that, she's lost any credibility to be heard.
While you and your husband may see nothing wrong with having separate bank accounts and keeping your money separately, there also isn't anything right about it. You see, we shouldn't just make decisions based on whether there is anything wrong with something. Things don't have to be specifically wrong for you not to do them. Moreover, the fact that there isn't specifically something wrong with something doesn't make it right.
Marriage is a union of two people - where they become one in every aspect possible. To hold out an important area of yourselves or your lives like money is inconsistent with the oneness that God prescribes for marriage. If you're willing to compartmentalize your finances, what else might you compartmentalize? Maybe separate finances aren't causing a problem in your marriage today. But they do suggest a weakness in your unity. Do you really want to go on with that weakness?
Sunday, February 21, 2010
Luge Death
Dear Victor,
Who do you think is to blame for the death of Nodar Kumaritashvili on the luge course at the Winter Olympics?
Kyle N. - Centennial, CO
Dear Kyle,
I don't know. That's the honest answer. I've read what you read (in the press) and I've watched the video footage of the accident. It was an accident. It seems that the tragedy of an accident like this motivates people to look for a villain. Sometimes there is no villain. Stuff just happens. I suspect that is the case here.
Mr. Kumaritashvili is said to have phoned his father days earlier and told him that the course was dangerous and he was afraid of it. So it appears to me that the athlete recognized the risks and the danger. He could have withdrawn, and in hind sight, that would have been a wise move on his part. But he didn't. He decided to proceed with his participation. He decided he could handle the danger and that the risks were worth it. Now it is clear that he was wrong.
No doubt important lessons are learned when things like this happen. Instead of looking for blame, it might be more productive to forgive those who may have had a role to play, and pray for the hearts of the those involved to be sustained and healed through their grief. We can grieve with them, and comfort them, and honor the memory of the fallen. And we can do all of that without placing blame.
Who do you think is to blame for the death of Nodar Kumaritashvili on the luge course at the Winter Olympics?
Kyle N. - Centennial, CO
Dear Kyle,
I don't know. That's the honest answer. I've read what you read (in the press) and I've watched the video footage of the accident. It was an accident. It seems that the tragedy of an accident like this motivates people to look for a villain. Sometimes there is no villain. Stuff just happens. I suspect that is the case here.
Mr. Kumaritashvili is said to have phoned his father days earlier and told him that the course was dangerous and he was afraid of it. So it appears to me that the athlete recognized the risks and the danger. He could have withdrawn, and in hind sight, that would have been a wise move on his part. But he didn't. He decided to proceed with his participation. He decided he could handle the danger and that the risks were worth it. Now it is clear that he was wrong.
No doubt important lessons are learned when things like this happen. Instead of looking for blame, it might be more productive to forgive those who may have had a role to play, and pray for the hearts of the those involved to be sustained and healed through their grief. We can grieve with them, and comfort them, and honor the memory of the fallen. And we can do all of that without placing blame.
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Mark of the Beast
Dear Victorious,
I am getting increasingly uneasy about the number of "membership cards" I have to carry in order to do business. It seems everyone wants me to have one of their cards, in order to get the best price, etc. It's irritating too. But as a Christian, isn't this just moving us closer to "the mark of the beast?" It makes me afraid. How could we get around it without suffering more?
Anna W. - Auburn Hills, MI
Dear Anna,
Well, the honest answer is that I don't know. But if I examine what the Bible says, it seems that the "mark of the beast" will be necessary for conducting commerce or participating in the economy. One could argue that the U.S. social security number took us into that space decades ago. The value membership cards that everyone is pushing on us these days could play into it, I suppose. But unless those stores link up together, I doubt they can wield any real power over us.
So here's the thing. Christians are not to be afraid of the end times. Whether it's the Antichrist, the "mark of the beast" or whatever, we are not to fear it. So if you're confronted with something that makes you uncomfortable, I do have some advice. First, make sure your perspective and understanding are grounded in God's truth. But second, seek God's guidance in prayer before you decide. And finally, when you believe God has given you an answer, ask another mature Christian to help you discern whether it lines up with Scripture.
There may be things we are not to do in this future economy that seems to be pressing in on us. But not doing it won't be a struggle for someone who is being led by Christ.
I am getting increasingly uneasy about the number of "membership cards" I have to carry in order to do business. It seems everyone wants me to have one of their cards, in order to get the best price, etc. It's irritating too. But as a Christian, isn't this just moving us closer to "the mark of the beast?" It makes me afraid. How could we get around it without suffering more?
Anna W. - Auburn Hills, MI
Dear Anna,
Well, the honest answer is that I don't know. But if I examine what the Bible says, it seems that the "mark of the beast" will be necessary for conducting commerce or participating in the economy. One could argue that the U.S. social security number took us into that space decades ago. The value membership cards that everyone is pushing on us these days could play into it, I suppose. But unless those stores link up together, I doubt they can wield any real power over us.
So here's the thing. Christians are not to be afraid of the end times. Whether it's the Antichrist, the "mark of the beast" or whatever, we are not to fear it. So if you're confronted with something that makes you uncomfortable, I do have some advice. First, make sure your perspective and understanding are grounded in God's truth. But second, seek God's guidance in prayer before you decide. And finally, when you believe God has given you an answer, ask another mature Christian to help you discern whether it lines up with Scripture.
There may be things we are not to do in this future economy that seems to be pressing in on us. But not doing it won't be a struggle for someone who is being led by Christ.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Childhood Obesity
Dear Victorious,
What do you think of Michelle Obama's recently announced campaign against childhood obesity? Do you think her campaign can really make a difference in this problem in our country?
Herb S. - Dallas, TX
Dear Herb,
It occurs to me that Mrs. Obama has considerable influence. From that perspective, she may be able to raise awareness of both the problem and practical ways to fight it (i.e., healthier eating and exercise). That's a good thing.
The part that Mrs. Obama's campaign may not be effectively addressing are the issues behind obesity. And there are a number of them. They range from emotional needs not being met to selfishness, demand for immediate gratification, ignorance of natural consequences and more.
Can her campaign really make a difference? I don't know. But it is a noble cause for her to get behind - and I'm pretty sure there's no harm in her pursuing it. In fact, even if it isn't effective, I suspect it'll have a positive impact at some level. That's a good thing as well.
What do you think of Michelle Obama's recently announced campaign against childhood obesity? Do you think her campaign can really make a difference in this problem in our country?
Herb S. - Dallas, TX
Dear Herb,
It occurs to me that Mrs. Obama has considerable influence. From that perspective, she may be able to raise awareness of both the problem and practical ways to fight it (i.e., healthier eating and exercise). That's a good thing.
The part that Mrs. Obama's campaign may not be effectively addressing are the issues behind obesity. And there are a number of them. They range from emotional needs not being met to selfishness, demand for immediate gratification, ignorance of natural consequences and more.
Can her campaign really make a difference? I don't know. But it is a noble cause for her to get behind - and I'm pretty sure there's no harm in her pursuing it. In fact, even if it isn't effective, I suspect it'll have a positive impact at some level. That's a good thing as well.
Eating Pork
Dear Victor,
My brother has become some kind of "holy roller" and it's driving us all nuts. His latest deal is our plan for Easter. We typically have a spiral-cut ham and everyone enjoys it. He says he no longer eats pork. Moreover, he says the most righteous of Christians wouldn't eat such foods. My mother is very proud of her Easter hams and its got everyone bickering. Aren't Christians free to eat whatever they want?
Marci M. - Durant, OK
Dear Marci,
Yes, Christians are free to eat whatever they want. But there are three caveats that I can think of. First of all, Old Testament laws on foods are still viewed by nutritionists as sensible eating plans. Second, Christians are to do everything in moderation when it comes to consumption. Third, Christians are to love others as they would like to be loved.
That your brother has chosen to stop eating pork is a personal choice. He is free to make it. However, he is not free to foist that choice on others, use it to make others feel guilty, or become a bother to others with his choice.
My advice? Mom should cook her famous "Easter ham" for everyone to enjoy. Anyone who chooses not to enjoy it is free to bring whatever they want to eat instead --- and keep their mouth shut. You should tell your brother about this plan immediately.
My brother has become some kind of "holy roller" and it's driving us all nuts. His latest deal is our plan for Easter. We typically have a spiral-cut ham and everyone enjoys it. He says he no longer eats pork. Moreover, he says the most righteous of Christians wouldn't eat such foods. My mother is very proud of her Easter hams and its got everyone bickering. Aren't Christians free to eat whatever they want?
Marci M. - Durant, OK
Dear Marci,
Yes, Christians are free to eat whatever they want. But there are three caveats that I can think of. First of all, Old Testament laws on foods are still viewed by nutritionists as sensible eating plans. Second, Christians are to do everything in moderation when it comes to consumption. Third, Christians are to love others as they would like to be loved.
That your brother has chosen to stop eating pork is a personal choice. He is free to make it. However, he is not free to foist that choice on others, use it to make others feel guilty, or become a bother to others with his choice.
My advice? Mom should cook her famous "Easter ham" for everyone to enjoy. Anyone who chooses not to enjoy it is free to bring whatever they want to eat instead --- and keep their mouth shut. You should tell your brother about this plan immediately.
Gay Clergy
Dear Victorious,
Our pastor says that gay clergy is becoming a real issue in Protestant churches. I know there are specifically gay churches (there's one in my home town). But isn't this really being blown out of proportion? Is this religious homophobia really justified when the gays are really just leading on the fringe?
David C. - San Clemente, CA
Dear David,
I'm not sure how to answer your question - or even if you've really asked a question. To say that gays are "just leading on the fringe" of religion seems pretty short-sighted in my opinion. I don't think I could agree with such a conclusion. I simply don't have enough information to draw such a conclusion. But let's look at some examples that are getting the religious right riled up.
The Church wide Assembly of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America (ELCA) voted to allow non celibate gay clergy on its leadership rosters.
The Episcopal Diocese of Los Angeles had six candidates for assistant bishop this past December - one of whom was an openly gay man. Another of those candidates was a practicing lesbian. (Read both of these as "non celibate.") The Episcopal General Convention has passed a resolution repealing the moratorium on consecrating gay bishops, and another allowing (but not requiring) its bishops to authorize same-sex marriages.
The Presbyterian Church (USA) has tried repeatedly to loosen its sexual standards for pastors, mostly to open the door for practicing (non celibate) homosexuals or to cohabiting pastors.
I don't think you can really call this "fringe" behavior or relegate it to isolated incidents. These are the hierarchy of mainstream Protestant churches in America. And they are being more tolerant of - even embracing - what Scripture specifically forbids. That is enough to give the religious right heartburn. It's tantamount to seeing our churches embrace heresy and sin.
If you want to argue about whether or not Scripture really does forbid homosexuality, you'll need to write to someone else. I've done my homework on that subject and believe only a fool would debate what God has made clear.
Our pastor says that gay clergy is becoming a real issue in Protestant churches. I know there are specifically gay churches (there's one in my home town). But isn't this really being blown out of proportion? Is this religious homophobia really justified when the gays are really just leading on the fringe?
David C. - San Clemente, CA
Dear David,
I'm not sure how to answer your question - or even if you've really asked a question. To say that gays are "just leading on the fringe" of religion seems pretty short-sighted in my opinion. I don't think I could agree with such a conclusion. I simply don't have enough information to draw such a conclusion. But let's look at some examples that are getting the religious right riled up.
The Church wide Assembly of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America (ELCA) voted to allow non celibate gay clergy on its leadership rosters.
The Episcopal Diocese of Los Angeles had six candidates for assistant bishop this past December - one of whom was an openly gay man. Another of those candidates was a practicing lesbian. (Read both of these as "non celibate.") The Episcopal General Convention has passed a resolution repealing the moratorium on consecrating gay bishops, and another allowing (but not requiring) its bishops to authorize same-sex marriages.
The Presbyterian Church (USA) has tried repeatedly to loosen its sexual standards for pastors, mostly to open the door for practicing (non celibate) homosexuals or to cohabiting pastors.
I don't think you can really call this "fringe" behavior or relegate it to isolated incidents. These are the hierarchy of mainstream Protestant churches in America. And they are being more tolerant of - even embracing - what Scripture specifically forbids. That is enough to give the religious right heartburn. It's tantamount to seeing our churches embrace heresy and sin.
If you want to argue about whether or not Scripture really does forbid homosexuality, you'll need to write to someone else. I've done my homework on that subject and believe only a fool would debate what God has made clear.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Withheld Forgiveness
Dear Victorious,
I did something really wrong to a friend of mine a couple of years ago. I felt really bad about it and eventually went and asked her to forgive me. But she hasn't. She says it's not about me, but that she "may never be able to forgive" me. What can I do? I feel really bad about what I've done, but it doesn't seem fair to keep punishing me like this indefinitely. Besides, I miss our friendship.
Lynette R. - Port St. Lucie, FL
Dear Lynette,
What you can do is put this in its proper perspective. Whenever we do something wrong in our lives, there is always a chance that we will suffer natural consequences. This is true no matter how sorry we are or how much of an effort we make with regard to restitution. So the fact that your friend hasn't forgiven you should be viewed as one of those unfortunate consequences to our own poor choices.
At the same time, if your friend is truly a Christ-follower, then withholding forgiveness is not an option for her. She is obligated to forgive, and to do otherwise is simply sin on her part. Now she may find that the wound she received from you is so deep that she can't get past the pain to offer the forgiveness. In that case, she could get on her knees and ask God to heal the wound and help her offer you that forgiveness. But until she comes to this conclusion and willingness on her own, there's not much you can do to change her.
So what do you do? First make sure you've apologized and expressed how sorry you are for hurting her. Do this without justifying or blaming anyone or anything. Second, you do whatever may be in your power to make the situation right. In other words, you fix whatever can be fixed (or paid for). Finally you leave it there. Continue to grovel, beg or lash back in anger or frustration are not Christ-like behaviors for you to engage in. If you do anything, you can simply pray for your friend's heart to be softened and her wound to be healed.
I did something really wrong to a friend of mine a couple of years ago. I felt really bad about it and eventually went and asked her to forgive me. But she hasn't. She says it's not about me, but that she "may never be able to forgive" me. What can I do? I feel really bad about what I've done, but it doesn't seem fair to keep punishing me like this indefinitely. Besides, I miss our friendship.
Lynette R. - Port St. Lucie, FL
Dear Lynette,
What you can do is put this in its proper perspective. Whenever we do something wrong in our lives, there is always a chance that we will suffer natural consequences. This is true no matter how sorry we are or how much of an effort we make with regard to restitution. So the fact that your friend hasn't forgiven you should be viewed as one of those unfortunate consequences to our own poor choices.
At the same time, if your friend is truly a Christ-follower, then withholding forgiveness is not an option for her. She is obligated to forgive, and to do otherwise is simply sin on her part. Now she may find that the wound she received from you is so deep that she can't get past the pain to offer the forgiveness. In that case, she could get on her knees and ask God to heal the wound and help her offer you that forgiveness. But until she comes to this conclusion and willingness on her own, there's not much you can do to change her.
So what do you do? First make sure you've apologized and expressed how sorry you are for hurting her. Do this without justifying or blaming anyone or anything. Second, you do whatever may be in your power to make the situation right. In other words, you fix whatever can be fixed (or paid for). Finally you leave it there. Continue to grovel, beg or lash back in anger or frustration are not Christ-like behaviors for you to engage in. If you do anything, you can simply pray for your friend's heart to be softened and her wound to be healed.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Evolution
Dear Victorious,
My boyfriend and I are in an argument. He says that the theory of evolution can co-exist with the theory of Christianity. I say there is no room in Christianity for evolution. But neither of us can find a Biblical basis for our position. Which of us is right? Or which of us is more right?
Deidra T. - Springfield, MA
Dear Deidra,
Well, I suspect you both are wrong, but not for the reasons you might think.
Let's look at your boyfriend's position. Christianity is not a "theory." It is truth. In fact, anyone who believes in Christianity has already gotten past the theoretical point of view. If they hadn't they couldn't call themselves Christians! That is a big difference from the theory of evolution. So to call them both theories and say that they can lie beside each other seriously waters down Christianity. If that's what your boyfriend believes, it's a pretty good bet that he doesn't really know Jesus himself (i.e., he's not a Christian).
Your position isn't much better. You're saying that when God created mankind, you totally know exactly how He did it and can readily eliminate the possibility that He used some form of evolution to accomplish His creation. I don't know how you can make that claim, when the greatest theologians of all time haven't been able to explain how He did it. Whether the theory of evolution is true or not, it at least offers a plausible explanation for how God might have created mankind.
I think the best wisdom here is the Biblical advice we have not to argue about such things.
My boyfriend and I are in an argument. He says that the theory of evolution can co-exist with the theory of Christianity. I say there is no room in Christianity for evolution. But neither of us can find a Biblical basis for our position. Which of us is right? Or which of us is more right?
Deidra T. - Springfield, MA
Dear Deidra,
Well, I suspect you both are wrong, but not for the reasons you might think.
Let's look at your boyfriend's position. Christianity is not a "theory." It is truth. In fact, anyone who believes in Christianity has already gotten past the theoretical point of view. If they hadn't they couldn't call themselves Christians! That is a big difference from the theory of evolution. So to call them both theories and say that they can lie beside each other seriously waters down Christianity. If that's what your boyfriend believes, it's a pretty good bet that he doesn't really know Jesus himself (i.e., he's not a Christian).
Your position isn't much better. You're saying that when God created mankind, you totally know exactly how He did it and can readily eliminate the possibility that He used some form of evolution to accomplish His creation. I don't know how you can make that claim, when the greatest theologians of all time haven't been able to explain how He did it. Whether the theory of evolution is true or not, it at least offers a plausible explanation for how God might have created mankind.
I think the best wisdom here is the Biblical advice we have not to argue about such things.
Monday, February 15, 2010
Wisdom
Dear Victorious,
Tell me about wisdom. What is it? How do you get it? What makes one person wise and another foolish? Is it possible that someone can be wise and foolish at the same time - or rather that wisdom and foolishness could be found in the same individual? Finally, who would you say is the wisest person alive today?
Liam V. - Hauppauge, NY
Dear Liam,
You ask many good questions. Wisdom is not intellectual capacity or "smartness." Rather wisdom is the ability to see life from God's perspective - and then to know the best course of action to take in any situation. Think of that latter statement as knowing the answer to the question, "What would Jesus do?" (WWJD?)
King Solomon was an Old Testament leader who asked God for wisdom. God gave him so much wisdom that God said Solomon would be the "wisest man who ever lived." Yet even Solomon confessed that it was difficult to act and think wisely. Why is that? Because Solomon's wisdom was still corrupted by his sinful nature. And because the universe of things to be known is far beyond man's capacity to know. So Solomon was saying that no matter how wise one is, there will always be some mysteries that we can never understand - some things that we can never figure out.
Proverbs 9:10 teaches that the fear of the Lord (respect and honor) is the beginning of wisdom. True wisdom can only come from knowing and trusting God. It is not merely the way to find God, but it is the result of knowing God.
If you want to know more about wisdom and its characteristics, I'd recommend you read the Old Testament books of Ecclesiastes, Proverbs and Psalms (in that order). Then I'd recommend you read the New Testament book of James and the writings of the Apostle Paul. They, in my opinion, rank up there among the wisest men who ever lived.
Finally, who is the wisest person alive today? The answer of course is that I don't know - because I don't know all of the people who are alive today. And I would have to know them all to be able to assess the level of wisdom that they may or may not possess. But I would say that the wisest person alive today is the person who most fears the Lord.
Tell me about wisdom. What is it? How do you get it? What makes one person wise and another foolish? Is it possible that someone can be wise and foolish at the same time - or rather that wisdom and foolishness could be found in the same individual? Finally, who would you say is the wisest person alive today?
Liam V. - Hauppauge, NY
Dear Liam,
You ask many good questions. Wisdom is not intellectual capacity or "smartness." Rather wisdom is the ability to see life from God's perspective - and then to know the best course of action to take in any situation. Think of that latter statement as knowing the answer to the question, "What would Jesus do?" (WWJD?)
King Solomon was an Old Testament leader who asked God for wisdom. God gave him so much wisdom that God said Solomon would be the "wisest man who ever lived." Yet even Solomon confessed that it was difficult to act and think wisely. Why is that? Because Solomon's wisdom was still corrupted by his sinful nature. And because the universe of things to be known is far beyond man's capacity to know. So Solomon was saying that no matter how wise one is, there will always be some mysteries that we can never understand - some things that we can never figure out.
Proverbs 9:10 teaches that the fear of the Lord (respect and honor) is the beginning of wisdom. True wisdom can only come from knowing and trusting God. It is not merely the way to find God, but it is the result of knowing God.
If you want to know more about wisdom and its characteristics, I'd recommend you read the Old Testament books of Ecclesiastes, Proverbs and Psalms (in that order). Then I'd recommend you read the New Testament book of James and the writings of the Apostle Paul. They, in my opinion, rank up there among the wisest men who ever lived.
Finally, who is the wisest person alive today? The answer of course is that I don't know - because I don't know all of the people who are alive today. And I would have to know them all to be able to assess the level of wisdom that they may or may not possess. But I would say that the wisest person alive today is the person who most fears the Lord.
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Daily Devotional
Dear Victorious,
I went to the Christian bookstore to buy myself a daily devotional. I was surprised by how many there were! It seemed there were all sorts of themes and all sorts of purposes to these devotionals. How do you pick one out? Or does it matter? Are there any you'd recommend?
Steve E. - McKinney, TX
Dear Steve,
To start with, I think it does matter. Think about why you're buying a daily devotional. My guess is that you think it will help you develop a daily discipline of spending time with God's Word. (And that is a very good reason!) So I would look for a daily devotional that has that singular purpose.
The problem with many of the daily devotionals on the market these days is that they have a different agenda. Typically they are trying to make you feel good, address a specific problem in your life, or sell you on their specific agenda. Devotionals with titles like, "Chicken Soup for the Christian Soul," or "Dieters' Daily Devotional" are trying to make you feel good or single out one specific area of your life that needs more of God in it. Similarly, devotionals like "Purpose Driven Life" or "Wild At Heart" are selling an agenda or perspective. (While that in itself may not be wrong, it is not right enough.) And devotionals specifically for men or women have the same weakness - they just don't cover it all.
I would recommend some hard-hitting, well-balanced daily devotionals that take you deep into God's Word on a daily basis ... and that cover all aspects of the human experience. Some examples that I would recommend are:
"My Utmost for His Highest" by Oswald Chambers
"Insight for Leaders" by A. W. Tozer
"Thoughts From the Diary of A Desperate Man" by Walter A. Henrichson
You can find links to the first two on my main blog (http://www.victoriousconqueror.blogspot.com/) for access to them on-line. If you want to buy them in book form, the first one is widely available in most Christian bookstores or on-line. The third one I've listed is also very good, but harder to find. Amazon.com is out of them right now, but you can find used copies through Amazon and elsewhere.
(For what it's worth, I'd recommend just about anything else these same authors have written too.)
I went to the Christian bookstore to buy myself a daily devotional. I was surprised by how many there were! It seemed there were all sorts of themes and all sorts of purposes to these devotionals. How do you pick one out? Or does it matter? Are there any you'd recommend?
Steve E. - McKinney, TX
Dear Steve,
To start with, I think it does matter. Think about why you're buying a daily devotional. My guess is that you think it will help you develop a daily discipline of spending time with God's Word. (And that is a very good reason!) So I would look for a daily devotional that has that singular purpose.
The problem with many of the daily devotionals on the market these days is that they have a different agenda. Typically they are trying to make you feel good, address a specific problem in your life, or sell you on their specific agenda. Devotionals with titles like, "Chicken Soup for the Christian Soul," or "Dieters' Daily Devotional" are trying to make you feel good or single out one specific area of your life that needs more of God in it. Similarly, devotionals like "Purpose Driven Life" or "Wild At Heart" are selling an agenda or perspective. (While that in itself may not be wrong, it is not right enough.) And devotionals specifically for men or women have the same weakness - they just don't cover it all.
I would recommend some hard-hitting, well-balanced daily devotionals that take you deep into God's Word on a daily basis ... and that cover all aspects of the human experience. Some examples that I would recommend are:
"My Utmost for His Highest" by Oswald Chambers
"Insight for Leaders" by A. W. Tozer
"Thoughts From the Diary of A Desperate Man" by Walter A. Henrichson
You can find links to the first two on my main blog (http://www.victoriousconqueror.blogspot.com/) for access to them on-line. If you want to buy them in book form, the first one is widely available in most Christian bookstores or on-line. The third one I've listed is also very good, but harder to find. Amazon.com is out of them right now, but you can find used copies through Amazon and elsewhere.
(For what it's worth, I'd recommend just about anything else these same authors have written too.)
Saturday, February 13, 2010
Non-Profits
Dear Victorious,
My best friend started a non-profit charity to help homeless people. She's constantly talking about it and has asked on several occasions why I won't donate to it. Frankly, it's getting in the way of our friendship. But I really cannot afford to donate to one more charity. What should I do?
Nadine T. - Overland Park, KS
Dear Nadine,
You should tell your friend you're happy that God has called her to this ministry and that you want only the best for her. At the same time, you assure her that your money is God's money and you only do with it what He's told you to do. At this point, He has not given you permission to spend money on her charity. So it would appear that God has called you to something different than He's called your friend to. And you don't apologize for this truth either.
The thing about para-church ministries (i.e., Christian ministries who do work that Jesus would condone) is that they are not Biblical. The Biblical model is that everyone would give at least a tithe (10%) of their total household income to the church. In addition, they are to bring offerings and gifts for the poor, etc. to their church.
The Biblical model is that the storehouse (of the temple) be filled and that the poor, elderly, needy are taken care of by the temple out of that storehouse. So if the church were doing its job, we wouldn't need para-church ministries or government welfare programs either. Christians should be more focused on empowering their church to do its job than on ministries that circumvent the church in its role.
My best friend started a non-profit charity to help homeless people. She's constantly talking about it and has asked on several occasions why I won't donate to it. Frankly, it's getting in the way of our friendship. But I really cannot afford to donate to one more charity. What should I do?
Nadine T. - Overland Park, KS
Dear Nadine,
You should tell your friend you're happy that God has called her to this ministry and that you want only the best for her. At the same time, you assure her that your money is God's money and you only do with it what He's told you to do. At this point, He has not given you permission to spend money on her charity. So it would appear that God has called you to something different than He's called your friend to. And you don't apologize for this truth either.
The thing about para-church ministries (i.e., Christian ministries who do work that Jesus would condone) is that they are not Biblical. The Biblical model is that everyone would give at least a tithe (10%) of their total household income to the church. In addition, they are to bring offerings and gifts for the poor, etc. to their church.
The Biblical model is that the storehouse (of the temple) be filled and that the poor, elderly, needy are taken care of by the temple out of that storehouse. So if the church were doing its job, we wouldn't need para-church ministries or government welfare programs either. Christians should be more focused on empowering their church to do its job than on ministries that circumvent the church in its role.
Friday, February 12, 2010
Signed Letters
Dear Victorious,
I find it hard to believe that all of the people who write to you would sign their names and locations. Frankly, it seems like you just make up these letters and names. Care to explain?
Monty T. - Rio Rancho, NM
Dear Monty,
You are not the first to pose such a question. However, you are one of the few who signed your name. It's true that not all the letters I get are signed and identify their location. However, I was quickly creeped out by crackpots who wouldn't sign their name. So some time ago I decided to make that my boundary for civility. Anyone who doesn't sign their name and city gets a reply asking them to re-submit their question with their name and location. If they don't, I don't respond to them. And keep in mind that, to this point at least, I only answer one letter per day in my blog. That means not all letters get answered in the blog. So you're definitely not seeing the totality of letters I get or my responses.
I find it hard to believe that all of the people who write to you would sign their names and locations. Frankly, it seems like you just make up these letters and names. Care to explain?
Monty T. - Rio Rancho, NM
Dear Monty,
You are not the first to pose such a question. However, you are one of the few who signed your name. It's true that not all the letters I get are signed and identify their location. However, I was quickly creeped out by crackpots who wouldn't sign their name. So some time ago I decided to make that my boundary for civility. Anyone who doesn't sign their name and city gets a reply asking them to re-submit their question with their name and location. If they don't, I don't respond to them. And keep in mind that, to this point at least, I only answer one letter per day in my blog. That means not all letters get answered in the blog. So you're definitely not seeing the totality of letters I get or my responses.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Sexy Pastor
Dear Victorious,
Do you think it's healthy for a pastor to lust after his own wife? Our pastor often makes remarks about his "smokin' hot wife" or uses innuendo that reveals the sexy side of their relationship. It makes some of us uncomfortable. What should we do?
Ted R. - Roseville, CA
Dear Ted,
For a Christ-follower, expressing our sexuality is strictly limited to the bounds of a committed marriage relationship. However, within those boundaries, the couples are free to be as sexy as they want to be. Sex, as God intended it, is the celebration of the relationship - which is a gift from God. So in this context, I believe it is appropriate for your pastor to lust after his own wife. It would give me joy to know that my pastor had a marriage worth celebrating like that.
If your pastor's references to his sexuality are making you uncomfortable, you should first ask yourself why that is. Find someone who is more spiritually mature than you and talk about it with them. Ask them to help you check your motives and make sure there is nothing in you that is over-reacting to the pastor's comments. If then you are certain that his comments are truly out of line, take that other person with you and go talk to him about it.
Tell the pastor that you are truly overjoyed that he has a marriage worth celebrating and are glad to know that his marriage is healthy. But tell him that giving the congregation such an intimate look inside that marriage feels awkward for some people. Ask him to lighten up on the sexual comments and innuendo - out of respect for the people he's leading.
Do you think it's healthy for a pastor to lust after his own wife? Our pastor often makes remarks about his "smokin' hot wife" or uses innuendo that reveals the sexy side of their relationship. It makes some of us uncomfortable. What should we do?
Ted R. - Roseville, CA
Dear Ted,
For a Christ-follower, expressing our sexuality is strictly limited to the bounds of a committed marriage relationship. However, within those boundaries, the couples are free to be as sexy as they want to be. Sex, as God intended it, is the celebration of the relationship - which is a gift from God. So in this context, I believe it is appropriate for your pastor to lust after his own wife. It would give me joy to know that my pastor had a marriage worth celebrating like that.
If your pastor's references to his sexuality are making you uncomfortable, you should first ask yourself why that is. Find someone who is more spiritually mature than you and talk about it with them. Ask them to help you check your motives and make sure there is nothing in you that is over-reacting to the pastor's comments. If then you are certain that his comments are truly out of line, take that other person with you and go talk to him about it.
Tell the pastor that you are truly overjoyed that he has a marriage worth celebrating and are glad to know that his marriage is healthy. But tell him that giving the congregation such an intimate look inside that marriage feels awkward for some people. Ask him to lighten up on the sexual comments and innuendo - out of respect for the people he's leading.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Big Problem
Dear Victorious,
I've seen you blog about hypocrisy, false teaching, bad leaders and other issues in Christianity today. If you could point to one problem as the most important issue facing Christians today, what would it be?
Demond E. - Joliet, IL
Dear Demond,
In the west, or even just here in America, I believe the greatest single problem plaguing Christianity is the belief that we are forever saved for simply having professed a faith in Christ. Too many people call themselves Christians but do little or nothing else. The Bible is chock full of examples of the fact that fruit is expected from a life in Christ. And way too few people are bothered by the fact that there is little or no fruit at all from the millions who say they are living life in Christ.
I've seen you blog about hypocrisy, false teaching, bad leaders and other issues in Christianity today. If you could point to one problem as the most important issue facing Christians today, what would it be?
Demond E. - Joliet, IL
Dear Demond,
In the west, or even just here in America, I believe the greatest single problem plaguing Christianity is the belief that we are forever saved for simply having professed a faith in Christ. Too many people call themselves Christians but do little or nothing else. The Bible is chock full of examples of the fact that fruit is expected from a life in Christ. And way too few people are bothered by the fact that there is little or no fruit at all from the millions who say they are living life in Christ.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Happiness
Dear Victorious,
What can we do in life that will ensure happiness? I'd like to make sure my life is a happy one, but I have no idea of how to go about that? When I ask other people (parents, teachers, etc.) I get conflicting answers.
Tina E. - Biloxi, MS
Dear Tina,
We were created for the pleasure of God. And so in creating us, we were wired or engineered to need God. Simply put, we have an innate desire for God - whether we recognize it or not. So the truth about happiness is that it's not possible in worldly terms. There is no thing and no one in this world that can make you happy. It's a job that only God can do. He set it up that way!
Matthew 6:33 tells us, "But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you." What that means is that seeking God, and His ways, are the only ways to happiness. And when we heed that advice, all these things will be added unto you - which means everything else will work out. All your needs - emotionally, physically, spiritually and socially - will be met.
What can we do in life that will ensure happiness? I'd like to make sure my life is a happy one, but I have no idea of how to go about that? When I ask other people (parents, teachers, etc.) I get conflicting answers.
Tina E. - Biloxi, MS
Dear Tina,
We were created for the pleasure of God. And so in creating us, we were wired or engineered to need God. Simply put, we have an innate desire for God - whether we recognize it or not. So the truth about happiness is that it's not possible in worldly terms. There is no thing and no one in this world that can make you happy. It's a job that only God can do. He set it up that way!
Matthew 6:33 tells us, "But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you." What that means is that seeking God, and His ways, are the only ways to happiness. And when we heed that advice, all these things will be added unto you - which means everything else will work out. All your needs - emotionally, physically, spiritually and socially - will be met.
Monday, February 8, 2010
Character
Dear Victorious,
The Bible tells us to be generous, forgiving, merciful, etc. Is it possible that you could do things without love?
Keenan W. - The Dallis, WA
Dear Keenan,
I don't think so. Jesus said that, after loving God, the most important commandment we have is to love others. So I believe the intent is that love precedes everything else we are to do for others. Could you truly forgive someone if you didn't love them? Could you truly serve them if you didn't love them? Could you truly teach them if you didn't love them?
As you start to apply the context of love to each of these scenarios, we can see that love seems to make the difference. A school teacher, for example, is usually much more effective if the students are in relationship with that teacher. And so it is with each of the things we do for others. Like I said, after loving God, love for others is the most important thing and it seems to serve as the foundation for all other dimensions of our relationships in life.
The Bible tells us to be generous, forgiving, merciful, etc. Is it possible that you could do things without love?
Keenan W. - The Dallis, WA
Dear Keenan,
I don't think so. Jesus said that, after loving God, the most important commandment we have is to love others. So I believe the intent is that love precedes everything else we are to do for others. Could you truly forgive someone if you didn't love them? Could you truly serve them if you didn't love them? Could you truly teach them if you didn't love them?
As you start to apply the context of love to each of these scenarios, we can see that love seems to make the difference. A school teacher, for example, is usually much more effective if the students are in relationship with that teacher. And so it is with each of the things we do for others. Like I said, after loving God, love for others is the most important thing and it seems to serve as the foundation for all other dimensions of our relationships in life.
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Dog's Vomit
Dear Victorious,
Proverbs 26:11 says that "a dog returns to its own vomit." What does this mean?
Irene V. - Branson, MO
Dear Irene,
It means that the dog is foolish enough to return to its own sickness - or that which made it sick in the first place. The metaphor here is that people naturally return to their own foolishness. We tend not to learn from our mistakes - but repeat them. We know things are bad for us - but are drawn to those things.
Of course, that's our human condition. If we will die to self and yield to our spiritual condition, it will make much better choices!
Proverbs 26:11 says that "a dog returns to its own vomit." What does this mean?
Irene V. - Branson, MO
Dear Irene,
It means that the dog is foolish enough to return to its own sickness - or that which made it sick in the first place. The metaphor here is that people naturally return to their own foolishness. We tend not to learn from our mistakes - but repeat them. We know things are bad for us - but are drawn to those things.
Of course, that's our human condition. If we will die to self and yield to our spiritual condition, it will make much better choices!
Saturday, February 6, 2010
Political Party
Dear Victorious,
Are you a Republican or a Democrat?
Harvey A. - Nashua, NH
Dear Harvey,
Good question. I wish I had a good answer for you. Officially I'm registered as a Republican. However, I have never voted along party lines. I vote the candidates and the issues independently and always have. I couldn't imagine voting any other way. The Republicans and Democrats both have some good ideology. But they both fall apart on execution when they give in to partisanship, cronyism, pork barrel spending and other flaws of human nature.
I've always said that "mankind is too stupid to rule himself." The Republicans and the Democrats get better and better at proving my point all the time. I'd like both of them to trade in their ideology for a little dose of reality. And I'd like them to start making the best decisions for the good of the whole country (versus the good of the various factions in it). Of course that would require that they stay focused on the real priorities in this country. They've never been very good at that.
Are you a Republican or a Democrat?
Harvey A. - Nashua, NH
Dear Harvey,
Good question. I wish I had a good answer for you. Officially I'm registered as a Republican. However, I have never voted along party lines. I vote the candidates and the issues independently and always have. I couldn't imagine voting any other way. The Republicans and Democrats both have some good ideology. But they both fall apart on execution when they give in to partisanship, cronyism, pork barrel spending and other flaws of human nature.
I've always said that "mankind is too stupid to rule himself." The Republicans and the Democrats get better and better at proving my point all the time. I'd like both of them to trade in their ideology for a little dose of reality. And I'd like them to start making the best decisions for the good of the whole country (versus the good of the various factions in it). Of course that would require that they stay focused on the real priorities in this country. They've never been very good at that.
Friday, February 5, 2010
Terrorism
Dear Victorious,
Does the Bible have anything to say about terrorism? How should Christians regard terrorists?
Ignacio G. - San Clemente, CA
Dear Ignacio,
No, the Bible doesn't specifically mention the term "terrorism." However, there is quite a bit that the Bible says which instructs Christians in how to regard terrorism.
Almost every book in the Bible - both Old and New Testaments - contains verses that tell us not to fear. We are simply not to fear anything. God asks us to put our trust in Him.
Many, many books in the Bible - both Old and New Testaments - contain verses that tell us God is in charge. He is in charge of everything that exists and everything that happens in this world. Not one single thing happens then ... unless God allows it to happen. Even the devil had to get God's permission to afflict Job. Evil today still operates under God's authority.
There is an organization that I follow called Stratfor (http://www.stratfor.com/). It's a global, political intelligence group. it's president, George Friedman has said, "The purpose of terrorism in its purest form is to create a sense of insecurity among a public. It succeeds when fear moves a system to the point where it can no longer function." I believe he's got that right. Terrorists win when God-fearing people fear the terrorists more (than they fear God).
Does the Bible have anything to say about terrorism? How should Christians regard terrorists?
Ignacio G. - San Clemente, CA
Dear Ignacio,
No, the Bible doesn't specifically mention the term "terrorism." However, there is quite a bit that the Bible says which instructs Christians in how to regard terrorism.
Almost every book in the Bible - both Old and New Testaments - contains verses that tell us not to fear. We are simply not to fear anything. God asks us to put our trust in Him.
Many, many books in the Bible - both Old and New Testaments - contain verses that tell us God is in charge. He is in charge of everything that exists and everything that happens in this world. Not one single thing happens then ... unless God allows it to happen. Even the devil had to get God's permission to afflict Job. Evil today still operates under God's authority.
There is an organization that I follow called Stratfor (http://www.stratfor.com/). It's a global, political intelligence group. it's president, George Friedman has said, "The purpose of terrorism in its purest form is to create a sense of insecurity among a public. It succeeds when fear moves a system to the point where it can no longer function." I believe he's got that right. Terrorists win when God-fearing people fear the terrorists more (than they fear God).
Thursday, February 4, 2010
Squeezing Profits
Dear Victorious,
I work in a company that is owned by a so-called Christian. But the man is a penny-pinching miser. I understand the need for making a profit. However, he takes it "over the top" most of the time. We've got several examples of him chiseling the employees and the customers to squeeze every last penny out of a transaction. Business is good and he lives well, so we are hard-pressed to understand how he can call himself a Christian and yet be so miserly. Yet when we complain he defends his cheapskate ways and says they simply reflect his Christian virtue. Is this true?
Elton R. - Tampa, FL
Dear Elton,
No, I don't think it's true. Christians are supposed to be good stewards of their money, and not wasteful. At the same time though, Christians are supposed to be fair in business and generous to others - including those who work for them.
God established a concept in the Old Testament called "gleaning." It was an agricultural economy and God instructed the Israelites to leave some of their crops in the field, unharvested. This was for others who were needy to come along and harvest a bit for themselves.
This reveals to us God's intent for business owners. We can be good stewards of what God gives us without "squeezing every last penny" out of our business. In other words, Christians should run their businesses in such a way as to be generous to others. One way I could think of to do that would be to focus on giving everyone you do business with more value than they've bargained you for.
I work in a company that is owned by a so-called Christian. But the man is a penny-pinching miser. I understand the need for making a profit. However, he takes it "over the top" most of the time. We've got several examples of him chiseling the employees and the customers to squeeze every last penny out of a transaction. Business is good and he lives well, so we are hard-pressed to understand how he can call himself a Christian and yet be so miserly. Yet when we complain he defends his cheapskate ways and says they simply reflect his Christian virtue. Is this true?
Elton R. - Tampa, FL
Dear Elton,
No, I don't think it's true. Christians are supposed to be good stewards of their money, and not wasteful. At the same time though, Christians are supposed to be fair in business and generous to others - including those who work for them.
God established a concept in the Old Testament called "gleaning." It was an agricultural economy and God instructed the Israelites to leave some of their crops in the field, unharvested. This was for others who were needy to come along and harvest a bit for themselves.
This reveals to us God's intent for business owners. We can be good stewards of what God gives us without "squeezing every last penny" out of our business. In other words, Christians should run their businesses in such a way as to be generous to others. One way I could think of to do that would be to focus on giving everyone you do business with more value than they've bargained you for.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Sex Change
Dear Victor,
Some friends at work have been debating what Chastity Bono is doing (sex change). Most of us are church-going people, but none of us have found anything in the Bible that would forbid this. Still, I can't imagine any church condoning a sex change operation. Is there an argument for or against this from God's perspective?
Kevin L. - Vallejo, CA
Dear Kevin,
The Bible doesn't specifically mention sex change operations, probably because they were not medically or scientifically possible when the Bible was written. However, even when something is not mentioned in the Bible specifically, there are other things in the Bible which will help us understand God's perspective.
The Bible tells us that God made man and woman. He was intentional about it. (He is about everything.) There is also caution in the Bible about men wearing women's clothes or women wearing men's clothes. The best interpretations we have of that caution is that men and women are not to take on the identities of the other sex. We are not to reverse our sexual roles.
God has a purpose in making us uniquely male or female. It is offensive to God when we reject His purpose. So from a practical perspective, I don't care how someone feels, they are not a "man in a woman's body" or vice versa. They are believing at least one lie - about who they are. Sex changes, cross dressing or other such notions then are indeed not Biblical and are viewed as sin from God's perspective.
Some friends at work have been debating what Chastity Bono is doing (sex change). Most of us are church-going people, but none of us have found anything in the Bible that would forbid this. Still, I can't imagine any church condoning a sex change operation. Is there an argument for or against this from God's perspective?
Kevin L. - Vallejo, CA
Dear Kevin,
The Bible doesn't specifically mention sex change operations, probably because they were not medically or scientifically possible when the Bible was written. However, even when something is not mentioned in the Bible specifically, there are other things in the Bible which will help us understand God's perspective.
The Bible tells us that God made man and woman. He was intentional about it. (He is about everything.) There is also caution in the Bible about men wearing women's clothes or women wearing men's clothes. The best interpretations we have of that caution is that men and women are not to take on the identities of the other sex. We are not to reverse our sexual roles.
God has a purpose in making us uniquely male or female. It is offensive to God when we reject His purpose. So from a practical perspective, I don't care how someone feels, they are not a "man in a woman's body" or vice versa. They are believing at least one lie - about who they are. Sex changes, cross dressing or other such notions then are indeed not Biblical and are viewed as sin from God's perspective.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Finders Keepers
Dear Victorious,
My husband has a habit of keeping things that he finds. Sometimes they are things of value. He never turns them in or notifies anyone that he's found them. When I've questioned him on this, he just says the old (childish) rhyme, "Finders keepers, losers weepers." There haven't been any negative consequences, but somehow this still just feels wrong. What do you think?
Donna E. - Navarre, OH
Dear Donna,
It feels wrong because it is wrong. And there may not have been any negative consequences - but that's only as far as you know. The individuals who lost the items that your husband has found and kept may have suffered consequences that you're simply not aware of.
The Bible says that if you find something that belongs to someone else, you must return it to them. The Bible further says that if you find something and don't know who it belongs to, you must hold it until that person comes looking for it. (Deuteronomy 22:1-3)
Most counties, cities, schools, homeowners associations, clubs, places of business, etc. have a "lost-and-found" policy and process. It usually includes you turning in whatever it is that you've found and their holding it for a specified period of time. If it is not claimed within that time, they will typically give it to you. This is the only way I could ever see it fitting for a Christian to keep something that they've found.
My husband has a habit of keeping things that he finds. Sometimes they are things of value. He never turns them in or notifies anyone that he's found them. When I've questioned him on this, he just says the old (childish) rhyme, "Finders keepers, losers weepers." There haven't been any negative consequences, but somehow this still just feels wrong. What do you think?
Donna E. - Navarre, OH
Dear Donna,
It feels wrong because it is wrong. And there may not have been any negative consequences - but that's only as far as you know. The individuals who lost the items that your husband has found and kept may have suffered consequences that you're simply not aware of.
The Bible says that if you find something that belongs to someone else, you must return it to them. The Bible further says that if you find something and don't know who it belongs to, you must hold it until that person comes looking for it. (Deuteronomy 22:1-3)
Most counties, cities, schools, homeowners associations, clubs, places of business, etc. have a "lost-and-found" policy and process. It usually includes you turning in whatever it is that you've found and their holding it for a specified period of time. If it is not claimed within that time, they will typically give it to you. This is the only way I could ever see it fitting for a Christian to keep something that they've found.
Monday, February 1, 2010
Loving Discipline
Dear Victorious,
Is there such a thing as a loving way to discipline a child? If so, what does it look like?
Sheila Nguyen - Los Angeles, CA
Dear Sheila,
Yes, there is. If you are responsible for the discipline of someone else, be it a child, student, employee, etc. here are some guidelines to keep in mind:
1. Don't discipline in anger. Take time to cool down.
2. Let the punishment quickly follow the offense.
3. Be sure the degree of punishment reflects the seriousness of the offense.
4. End the punishment on a timely basis. (Don't let it drag on.)
5. Check your motive for the punishment. (Make sure it's sincere.)
Discipline that is swift, just and restrained makes its point while preserving the integrity of the offender.
I know there is controversy when it comes to spanking a child. Certainly you cannot spank someone else's child without their consent. But if you have the authority, spanking a child can certainly fit within the context of the guidelines I've just offered. This is particularly true when the child is too young to comprehend other consequences.
For example, if a three year old is sticking things in an electrical outlet, restricting him from TV or putting him in a time out are unlikely to change his behavior. He simply cannot correlate the punishment with the crime. A more effective punishment might be a spanking. On the other hand, the older a child gets, the less effective a spanking will be. Older children will be more likely to be harmed (emotionally, psychologically, etc.) from a spanking. It simply doesn't maintain their dignity.
Is there such a thing as a loving way to discipline a child? If so, what does it look like?
Sheila Nguyen - Los Angeles, CA
Dear Sheila,
Yes, there is. If you are responsible for the discipline of someone else, be it a child, student, employee, etc. here are some guidelines to keep in mind:
1. Don't discipline in anger. Take time to cool down.
2. Let the punishment quickly follow the offense.
3. Be sure the degree of punishment reflects the seriousness of the offense.
4. End the punishment on a timely basis. (Don't let it drag on.)
5. Check your motive for the punishment. (Make sure it's sincere.)
Discipline that is swift, just and restrained makes its point while preserving the integrity of the offender.
I know there is controversy when it comes to spanking a child. Certainly you cannot spank someone else's child without their consent. But if you have the authority, spanking a child can certainly fit within the context of the guidelines I've just offered. This is particularly true when the child is too young to comprehend other consequences.
For example, if a three year old is sticking things in an electrical outlet, restricting him from TV or putting him in a time out are unlikely to change his behavior. He simply cannot correlate the punishment with the crime. A more effective punishment might be a spanking. On the other hand, the older a child gets, the less effective a spanking will be. Older children will be more likely to be harmed (emotionally, psychologically, etc.) from a spanking. It simply doesn't maintain their dignity.
Dave Ramsey
Dear Victorious,
You've been trashing Dave Ramsey in your blog lately. Why do you dislike him so much?
Ralph C. - Waterloo, IA
Dear Ralph,
I don't dislike Dave Ramsey, and I don't believe I've trashed him. I have been a fan of his ministry for years. He's done a lot of people a world of good. However, I've recently been hearing him say things on his radio show that don't line up with Biblical principles. Moreover, they don't even line up with Dave's own teachings.
Mr. Ramsey's bitterness and resentment toward lenders and other creditors is inappropriate. Demonizing them and coaching people on how to retaliate against them are inappropriate. And that requires a course correction.
I'll continue to be a fan of Dave Ramsey's ministry. But if you read my blog(s) you also know I've written about the Biblical mandate to test everything we're taught, no matter who is teaching it. And Dave Ramsey is no exception.
You've been trashing Dave Ramsey in your blog lately. Why do you dislike him so much?
Ralph C. - Waterloo, IA
Dear Ralph,
I don't dislike Dave Ramsey, and I don't believe I've trashed him. I have been a fan of his ministry for years. He's done a lot of people a world of good. However, I've recently been hearing him say things on his radio show that don't line up with Biblical principles. Moreover, they don't even line up with Dave's own teachings.
Mr. Ramsey's bitterness and resentment toward lenders and other creditors is inappropriate. Demonizing them and coaching people on how to retaliate against them are inappropriate. And that requires a course correction.
I'll continue to be a fan of Dave Ramsey's ministry. But if you read my blog(s) you also know I've written about the Biblical mandate to test everything we're taught, no matter who is teaching it. And Dave Ramsey is no exception.
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