Arguing

Dear Victorious,

My husband likes to argue. I know that sounds silly, but I swear the man relishes a good argument. The thing is, I don't like to argue. In fact, I hate conflict. It causes me great stress. My husband says I need to stop being so sensitive, and realize that arguing is really just a normal way of testing a decision or thinking to make sure it is good. Somehow, I can't see it that way though. Help!

Norma V. - Boise, ID

Dear Norma,

I disagree with your husband. 2 Timothy 2:16-17 warn Christians to avoid idle, foolish talk because it can lead to ungodliness. 2 Timothy 2:23 is even more explicit. It says, "But refuse (shut your mind against, have nothing to do with) controversies over ignorant questionings, for you know that they foster strife and breed quarrels." (Amplified Bible)

Here's the question to ask your husband whenever he wants to argue. "Do you want to be right? Or do you want to be reconciled?" What your husband needs to learn is that arguing or "testing" a point is destructive to relationships. So he can argue all day, and he can prove that he's right. But he'll be right by himself.