Divorce Advice

Dear Victorious,

I am thinking of getting a divorce. My marriage is miserable and I've decided to get some advice from people who've gotten a divorce. What kind of questions should I ask them?

Yahlee P. - Murfreesboro, TN

Dear Yahlee,

I believe you are looking at this the wrong way. Instead of asking people who've gotten divorced how they made that decision - you should find some people who've stayed married and ask them how they made that decision! I'm serious. People who've gotten divorced have nothing to offer you but their own perspective on their own failed marriage. If you selfishly want out of your marriage and don't want to sacrifice and put forth the effort to make it work, then talk to your divorced friends. But if you seriously want to love your spouse and have a marriage that works, then get some advice from some people who've done it. Look for the longest, most stable marriages you can find. Then talk to those people and ask them how they've handled diversity, doubts, guilt, anger, resentment and bitterness, frustration, boredom and all the other things that you may be struggling with in your own marriage.