Dealing With Abuse

Dear Victorious,

I know that the Bible says we are to submit ourselves to one another, and that spouses are supposed to submit to each other. But what is a Christian to do when they find themselves in an abusive relationship?

Debra W. - Boulder, CO

Dear Debra,

Yes, the Bible does have much to say about submission to one another in all of our relationships. In fact, that is a core element of all godly relationships of any sort. But to say that a Christian should tolerate abuse is taking Scripture out of its context.

Jesus gave us a clear formula, for example, of what to do if we find someone in sin. We are to confront their sin. If they don't listen, we get witnesses to help us confront them. If they still don't listen, we ask the church to intervene and confront them. If they still don't listen, we separate ourselves from the relationship with the unrepentant sinner. This would be an excellent course of action to take when we find ourselves in an abusive relationship with someone else.

Often we enter into marriages, business partnerships and other sorts of relationships without regard to the Biblical admonition to not be unequally yoked (with people who don't share our faith and values). Then we are surprised and offended when these people don't act according to our faith and values. The point is that we (Christ-followers) are not meant to be in committed, intimate relationships with such people in the first place.

When we find ourselves in an abusive relationship, we must not only address the abusive relationship, we must also examine how we got there in the first place - and make appropriate course corrections for future relationships!

Keeping Sabbath

Dear Victorious,

Is it okay to shop on Sundays? I go to church and all, but it is convenient to shop on Sundays. And isn't the true Biblical sabbath really on Saturday anyway?

Joel N. - Arvada, CO

Dear Joel,

Just because the stores ... or the restaurants are open on Sundays doesn't make it okay to shop there. The Bible says that we are to keep the sabbath. It is to be a day of respect and honor for God, as well as a day of rest for His people. So look at how the Bible describes the keeping of the sabbath and tell me if you think shopping fits inside that definition. Even if we got to church on Sunday, I suspect that many of the other activities we engage in on Sundays would fall outside any true definition of keeping the sabbath.

America's Problems

Dear Victorious,

Our country has many problems. It seems the media doesn't stop talking about them! What do you believe is the worst problem that we have in the United States? What should be done about it?

Lorraine S. - St. Paul, MN

Dear Lorraine,

I think it is the problem of fiscal irresponsibility. And I don't just mean money. Our nation seems to be led by a group of people (politicians) who believe that we can continue to pay tomorrow for whatever we need to deal with today. So we continually put off "paying the piper" in one respect or another. As a result, America's strength and stability is a world leader is on very shaky ground. I believe the solution is simply political leadership that calls all Americans to accountable living in every aspect. (It's what I'm praying for!)

Rosh Hashanah

Dear Victorious,

I understand that Rosh Hashanah is a Jewish holy day, the start of their new year. How should Christians regard it? Doesn't it have Old Testament ties?

David B. - Lima, OH

Dear David,

I am not an expert on the Jewish faith, but I understand that Rosh Hashanah is the start of the Jewish New Year ... and the beginning of an annual 10 days of repentance. It does have Old Testament ties. But like many Old Testament practices which Jesus changed or eliminated (such as sacrificing animals for sin), Christians should not regard this. Repentance in particular is not something that true Christ-followers would pursue for 10 days once a year. Repentance is to be continuous, and occur as soon as we become aware that we have sinned.

Jewish holidays may be holy to the Jews, but for Christians they are pagan holidays with no particular meaning. So we respect the Jews and their right to celebrate them ... just as they respect us and our celebrations of holidays like Christmas or Easter.

Meat Eaters

Dear Victorious,

The Europeans eat horse meat. The Chinese eat cats. The Koreans eat dogs. Some cultures even eat insects. Somehow this just seems wrong on so many levels. How can Christianity take root in such cultures when they have such barbaric practices?

Doreen - Round Rock, TX

Dear Doreen,

The Bible is the authoritative word on the purpose of animals. All animals, including pets and insects, are to serve at our pleasure. They were put here to serve mankind. So eating horse, cat, dog or even insects is no more wrong than eating beef, pork or chicken. Our culture embraces food practices that other cultures would find repulsive. But the issue here is culture ... and not morals.

Fear of the Lord

Dear Victorious,

The Bible says that we are to "fear the Lord." What precisely does this mean? How does one actually do that?

Ron J. - San Antonio, TX

Dear Ron,

It's pretty simple, really. Change the word fear to the word respect and you'll have it. We are to stand in awe of our Lord, giving Him the respect and honor that He is due. Certainly His power should be frightening ... for someone who is not on His side. But for His own children, we simply respect Him above all else, revere Him and honor Him.

How do we actually do it? Show up for church on time. Dress appropriately. Engage in the worship. Care about what's being preached or taught. Read your Bible and regard what it says as important (after all, it is God's Word to you). Obey His commands. Examine your own behaviors and attitudes toward God and His ways --- and ask yourself if they reflect your reverence and respect for Him.

Kanye West

Dear Victorious,

Kanye West is in the news this week for his bad behavior at the MTV Music Awards. But I like Kanye West! What is a good little Christian to do when his or her favorite music artists behave badly?

Nancy N. - Grand Prairie, TX

Dear Nancy,

I think you have to realize that there's a two-sided transaction going on here (between you and Kanye West). Whenever we support a celebrity, such as a musician, it is a two-sided transaction. We get entertainment and enjoyment. They get our money. It is a business arrangement. And it's not much different from enjoying food from a restaurant or any other type of two-sided business transaction. So at some point, you have to decide which is more important to you ... your entertainment and your pleasure --- or your values.

Origin of Phrases

Dear Victorious,

I've heard sayings like, "The devil is in the details." Some of them sound as if they could have Biblical origins. Do you know the origins of some of these phrases? And how can we tell if they really have any meaning?

Joe T. - Morrison, CO

Dear Joe,

Well, I've heard phrases like that too. There are way too many of them to say if I know their origins. I am aware though that some do have Biblical origins. Whether or not they have any relevant meaning in modern context is probably debatable. You might want to check out a web site I like to look up phrases on. It's http://www.phrases.org.uk/. Or you can put the phrases in quotations and then Google it to get a variety of opinions as to its origin, meaning and relevance.

Obamacare Health Plan

Dear Victorious,

What do you think of President Obama's proposed Health Care plan?

Deloris M. - Sugar Land, TX

Dear Deloris,

I haven't read the whole proposal, but have followed the debate in the media. Frankly I am a bit suspicious. I don't think I have sufficient understanding to have confidence in it --- and my questions or reluctance to support it lie in the things about it that I'm not clear about (and there are several). I suppose the biggest questions I have are:

1. How will it impact me personally?
2. How will it impact most people? (Is it good for the masses?)
3. How will it be paid for? (Really paid for, not theoretically.)

Why Believe?

Dear Victorious,

Why do you think most people are Christians? I mean, what is the reason that most people believe as they believe?

Arnold D. - Wheatland, WY

Dear Arnold,

I suspect there are two reasons why most people believe as they do in Christianity today. The first is simply tradition. I suspect that religion is handed down from one generation to another. And this would be true in any religion - not just Christianity. The second is fear. People are afraid to end up in hell, so they believe.

Of course, neither is a good reason to believe. The challenge for every Christian today is to find better reasons to believe. The Bible tells us to know why we believe, and be prepared to defend our faith. That doesn't mean be prepared to debate which faith is the truest one. That means to know the true reasons why you believe.

September 11th

Dear Victorious,

Besides the event, what do you think of America's response to the 9/11 disaster?

R. T. - Dallas, TX

Dear R.T.,

I have two thoughts about that. First, the patriotism of every day Americans seems to have died out rather quickly. Everyone went out and bought flags, etc. I don't see those flags flying so much any more. Did we forget that quickly? Or are we just not that patriotic nowadays?

Second, our government over reacted. The security measures on airline travel are insane - much worse than other countries that have suffered terrorist attacks as well. I think we've also relied way too much on 9/11 to justify our wars in Afghanistan, Iraq and now Pakistan. The "war on terrorism" kicked off just after 9/11. I'm not sure that was the appropriate response --- or that we're fighting the right enemy.