Masturbation

Dear Victorious,

Is masturbation a sin?

E.C. - Kansas

Dear E.C.,

That is a difficult question. Masturbation is something of a taboo topic in churches today. It's not talked about. Society, on the other hand, seems to encourage it. I've seen advice columnists call it "normal" and even seem to encourage it. Certainly there is a substantial realm of our society that considers masturbation to be perfectly okay. But even if it were, not everything that's okay is good. No everything that's allowed is recommended. I believe masturbation is one of those things.

To be clear, there is no mention of masturbation in the Bible. Many things are discussed in the Bible and either recommended or forbidden. That masturbation is not leads many to conclude that it is not a sin. I've dealt with this topic in ministry quite a bit, however - and I can tell you that many people who engage in this routinely don't feel good about it. In fact, my observation and experience is that the more Christ-like one becomes, the more that masturbation seems to bother them. It doesn't escape me that the Holy Spirit convicts us of what He doesn't want us doing. Said another way, if your conscience bothers you about it, you shouldn't be doing it.

I will say that masturbation may not be a sin. However, most often it is a practice that is not easily accomplished without sin of some sort. Selfishness, worshipping false gods, lust in your heart for someone other than your wife, pornography and other sins typically accompany masturbation. Indeed, masturbation for most people does not occur outside of these dynamics, even for a single person.

For a married person, we can take the above list of sins, and add to it. A married person who masturbates usually does it in secret ... behind their spouse's back. This would be wrong. When we marry, we give our bodies - including our sexuality - to our spouses. Having any sort of sexual expression without one's spouse then is a sin. So if you are married, then the only way you could masturbate and not have it be a sin would be to do with your spouse's consent, with your spouse present.

Having said these things, I don't put masturbation any higher than any other sin. It behaves much like any other sin and enslaves just like other sins. In fact, it is a common addiction in today's society - behaving like other addictions. It needs to be treated like any other enslaving sin.

So, to answer your question, masturbation in and of itself may or may not be a sin in God's eyes. However, if it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck, etc. - then it is probably a duck. Masturbation looks and acts very much like sin. So if I were you, I would treat it that way. Confess it to God and someone else who is trustworthy (James 5:16), and turn from it. Then commit to expressing your sexuality in God-honoring ways.