Q: Is there a Biblical framework for solving conflict? I mean when we get into an argument with someone, how do we solve it? Is there some principle in the Bible that would work in any situation?
A: Yes, there is. Read chapters 5, 6, & 7 in the book of Matthew. It's Jesus' Sermon on the Mount and contains a variety of principles for healthy living. People are human and flawed. So we have the inherent drift toward conflict with each other. The only way to avoid or resolve that conflict is to focus on points of agreement instead of points of disagreement.
If my wife and I cannot agree on which sofa to purchase, let's back away from the sofa shopping exercise and look for some point of agreement above the sofa. Maybe it's the style of the room, the level of comfort we want, or the amount and type of entertaining that we'd like to do. Or if we can't agree on how many children we want, let's back away from that conversation and talk about why we want children, what kind of family we think we'd like to have, etc.
If you look for them, there will always be something that you can agree on that will be higher in priority than the point you're disagreeing on. So when you run into a disagreement, stop and go back to one of those points of agreement. From there, you'll find the compromise or the resolution to the conflict.
Showing posts with label reconciliation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label reconciliation. Show all posts
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Complete Forgiveness
Q: I know that Christ-followers are compelled to forgive everyone and everything. And I've read your blog about sometimes God has to help bring about that kind of complete forgiveness. So what are the signs of complete forgiveness? How do you know if the forgiveness is sufficient, adequate, complete, etc.?
A: Complete forgiveness is always evidenced by actions. If I forgive you, but don't ever want to see you again - my forgiveness isn't complete. Another way to look at it is that the result of completed forgiveness will always be reconciliation.
When God forgives us, He separates us from our sin "as far as the east is from the west." (Psalm 103:12) And then God treats us as if we had never sinned. He relates to us as though the sin had never been committed at all. In His eyes, we are sinless.
This is the kind of forgiveness that Christ-followers are compelled to offer others. We'll have a hard time, as humans, separating them from the offense "as far as the east is from the west." that's why we most likely will need God's help to accomplish that level of effective forgiveness. So if you want to know whether or not the forgiveness is real and complete, look at the strength of the reconciliation. Is the relationship completely restored - as though the matter to be forgiven had never happened? If not, then the forgiveness needs more work.
A: Complete forgiveness is always evidenced by actions. If I forgive you, but don't ever want to see you again - my forgiveness isn't complete. Another way to look at it is that the result of completed forgiveness will always be reconciliation.
When God forgives us, He separates us from our sin "as far as the east is from the west." (Psalm 103:12) And then God treats us as if we had never sinned. He relates to us as though the sin had never been committed at all. In His eyes, we are sinless.
This is the kind of forgiveness that Christ-followers are compelled to offer others. We'll have a hard time, as humans, separating them from the offense "as far as the east is from the west." that's why we most likely will need God's help to accomplish that level of effective forgiveness. So if you want to know whether or not the forgiveness is real and complete, look at the strength of the reconciliation. Is the relationship completely restored - as though the matter to be forgiven had never happened? If not, then the forgiveness needs more work.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
